With Friends Like These…

My wife and I are laying the groundwork for our second adoption. Part of that process is getting an updated home study. During the home study social workers assess your ability to afford another child, parent properly, and provide the basic necessities.

To help them in their task, they ask us to solicit letters of recommendation from people who will vouge for our character. My friend Bob Bankus sent me a letter for my approval before I told him it was ok to send in. Thank God I read it and did not just tell him to mail it off. Here is what it said:

To whom it may concern:

I have know Thor for over 8 years and Kimberly since they started dating.

Ever since he got out of the slammer, Thor hardly ever blacks out from drinking too much anymore. He’s doin’ real good.

Most of the loaded guns are hidden or put away so the kids can’t reach them yet. The rest of the guns aint loaded so they aint gonna hurt nobody.

Kimberly done stayed clean and sober now for a while. I think she has her 30 day chip. So she’s got that goin’ for her. I know she has been working real hard for that.

Jake is wearing clothes on a pretty regular basis. And they got plenty of food stamps so you don’t gotta worry about the kids havin’ enough to eat.

Some people might think the reptile sanctuary in their basement with the alligators and snake collection is a little strange, but I will have you know that theirs is one of the most impressive and complete private collections of reptiles anywhere in the Midwest.

So I gonna shoot ya straight, with all them positive traits, I think it is a no-brainer. Give’em a kid!

Thanks,

Billy Bob

Thanks for sending the the REAL letter in a separate email Bob 🙂